


Trying to Cope

by Warden_Champion_Inquisitor



Category: Darksiders (Video Games)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Death Rides for the Tri-Stone, F/M, Reader-Insert, Self-Harm, reader is a Mess, trigger warning for self harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-02
Updated: 2017-10-02
Packaged: 2019-01-07 23:18:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12242583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Warden_Champion_Inquisitor/pseuds/Warden_Champion_Inquisitor
Summary: Death finds (Y/N) worse for wear when he returns to the Tri-Stone.





	Trying to Cope

**Author's Note:**

> Again, trigger warning for self-harm and alcoholism.

Death rode towards the Forge Lands. That’s where Crowfather said she would be. He did not know why he needed to see her one last time, but he couldn’t stop himself from riding swiftly towards his destination. He had decided to observe her first to see how she was faring without him. Then, he would ask the Makers if she was doing alright and if she was, then he would leave and never see her again. The thought made his chest tighten in a way that he had never felt before. But, it did not matter how he felt. He held (Y/N)’s feelings above his own.

 

Death arrived in the dead of night, Thane waiting at the Tree to greet him.

 

“You’re a welcome sight.” Thane welcomed Death with a clap on the back.

 

“How is she?” Death questioned getting straight to the point.

 

“She’s doing great Death.” He replied with a large smile. “For the first few days she was a wreck, but then she started to help around the Tri-Stone which I think helped a lot with coping.” If Death had a heart it would’ve sunk. He was pleased that she was alright but it made him unhappy that she got over him so easily. He knew that wouldn’t be the case for him. Though Thane’s words seemed true, Death still needed to confirm it for himself. He needed to see her.

 

“Where is she right now?” He asked.

 

“She’d be in her room but she could be outside as well.” The last part of his sentence concerned Death a little bit.

 

“Thank you, Thane.” Death thanked and took off on Despair leaving Thane alone and confused. Death made it to the Tri-Stone in no time and easily snuck into (Y/N)’s room. It was empty. He walked around the empty room and took in a breath. Lavender. That was Death’s favorite things about (Y/N). She always smelled like lavender. He walked to the bed and sat down when his foot knocked something over. He looked down to see an empty bottle roll under her bed. He grabbed the bottle, bringing it up to his nose to take a sniff. It was alcohol. Death knelt down beside the bed and lifted up the bed skirt to reveal bottles scattered everywhere, enough to kill a human ten times over. He shot up, rage bubbling up inside of him towards Thane and the Makers for not realizing what was going on. Death stormed out of the room and out into the courtyard where Thane and the other Makers were waiting.

 

“Death what are you-” Thane’s words were cut off by a scythe being shoved against his throat.

 

“You said she was fine!” Death yelled at him pressing the scythe hard enough to draw blood.

 

“She is, Death,” Karn said trying to defuse the situation. Death whipped his head around and sent a glare towards Karn that silenced him.

 

“She has been intoxicated this entire time. I found bottles upon bottles hiding in her room. Most of them were empty.” Death snarled. Thane was about to reply when Death removed his blade looking completely calm. “I am going to find her and I am taking her away from here.” His voice was deadly calm as he turned and summoned Despair trying to stay his urge to kill every single Maker that he left behind as he rode out to find (Y/N).

 

It took Death no time to find (Y/N). She was sitting on top of a hill, three large and empty bottles seated beside her and another in her left hand. In her right hand, she held what looked like a knife. Death’s eyes widened as he watched her take a swig of the dark liquid and then bring the knife down onto her thigh. Death moved without thinking and closed the distance between the two. She looked up at him but he could tell that she was too inebriated to even realize who he was. He smacked the knife out of her hand and dumped out the rest of the alcohol out of her bottle.

 

“What are you doing?” She screamed reaching for the knife. “Give it back!” She got up and stumbled towards him leaving a trail of blood behind her. She screamed at him again, the smell of alcohol flooding Death’s nostrils. Death was angry. He was mad at himself for doing this to her. Looking at her thigh, Death examined her wounds forcing her to sit down.

 

“Who the hell do you think you are?!” (Y/N) slurred indignantly slapping his hand away from her bleeding thigh. Death pursed his lips and held her down. Ripping a piece off his cowl he began to bandage the cuts that she gave herself. “Let me go!” She shrieked putting all of her strength into escaping his grip. She managed to slip out of his hold and drag herself to the bottle that Death dumped out. Death kicked it out of the way causing (Y/N) to let out an angry shout. Death pulled her back and turned her to face him. In one swift move (Y/N)’s hand connected with Death’s cheek. The smack echoed through the night as Death became still. “Leave me alone.” She hissed and moved backward. Death made no move to follow. (Y/N) reached for the bottle again and emptied the last drops onto her tongue. Death sat across from her still reeling from the slap that she had given. How could she become this destructive? He glanced at her to see her eyeing him up. “You remind me of a man I once knew.” She mumbled looking down at her bare legs. She traced the scars. “If he saw me now he would most likely kill me.” She sniffed. “He would be so disappointed.” She laughed darkly. “Seems like that’s all I'm good at doing.” Death stayed quiet. She picked open one of her older cuts and watched the blood seep out. “He was my everything.” (Y/N) whispered. “He was the only thing I had left in this world.” She began to cry. Death scooted closer to her and rested his hand on her shoulder. “I just want him back.” She sobbed and leaned into his touch. Eventually, he pulled her into his chest and waited for her to fall asleep. When she finally did, Death found a cave for them to wait out the night in. He made sure to clean and bandage (Y/N)’s wounds saddened by the mass of scars that covered her silken skin. He had no idea that (Y/N) had felt so strongly towards him, so much so that it turned her into this. He sighed and took up his silent vigil, waiting for the morning to come.

 

(Y/N) stirred as she woke. She couldn’t remember much from last night save for smacking someone. Stomach turning, she shot up and retched. Nothing came out as she dry heaved over and over again tears spilling from her eyes. She deserved this. Panting she sat back and noticed a purple cloth wrapped around her thigh that she had marred with cuts last night. She stared. It was the same color as the Cowl that Death used to wear. Slowly she turned around to see none other than Death himself sitting against the wall. Horror. That was the first emotion that she felt. It was Death who she slapped last night, it was Death who had witnessed her darkest moments. “D-Death.” She whispered. How could he be alive? He was probably thinking about how pathetic she was. The thought brought her to tears.

 

“(Y/N),” He sighed, knowing what she was thinking. “Do not cry.”

 

“I-I’m so sorry.” She sobbed an apology pulling her knees to her chest trying her hardest to hide her face from Death. “I’m so pathetic.” Death reached out and pulled (Y/N) into his chest.

 

“Hush Small One,” He chided softly. “Do not apologize. I didn’t realize how much my death would’ve affected you, or how much you cared for me.” She looked up at him, tears glistening in her eyes.

 

“I love you, Death.” He looked away and (Y/N)’s heart sank. He really did think she was pathetic.

 

“I, I did not know.” He sounded almost regretful, “If I did, I would’ve done everything differently.”

 

“I don’t understand. Death, look at me.” She demanded weakly, not comprehending what he meant. He remained looking away from her. He didn’t know how to process these, feelings. The only emotions Death had ever felt were love for his siblings, hatred, remorse and most of all, self-loathing. Right now, that’s what he was feeling. He loathed himself for making (Y/N) deal with her emotions and feelings alone. He loathed himself for feeling the way he did towards her. This would all be so much easier if he could just leave her. That thought made him loathe himself even more. How could a human so pure and beautiful ever fall in love with a monster like him? Those past months that Death had spent with (Y/N) were the best of his entire life. She made him feel like he had never felt before. She made him question his self-loathing. She had made him question why he was worthless. She brought out the good in him. But now, looking at what Death did to her, those feelings came back, the self-loathing, the hatred. “Death,” She pleaded, waiting for his answer.

 

“I do not deserve your love.” Death finally answered not meeting her eyes once. (Y/N) got to her knees and grabbed his face with both hands and forced their eyes to meet.

 

“Don’t ever say that again.” There was a fierceness in her eyes that he had never witnessed before. “You were the one who found me and kept me alive. You were the one who saved me from myself. You were the one who put his own personal wants aside to resurrect humanity. You were the one who died for humanity. If anything, I don’t deserve you, I proved that last night.” This time it was (Y/N) who looked away remembering the slap from last night. A cool finger slid across her cheek to wipe away a tear that had escaped. Death laid his hand against her cheek not wanting her to cry any longer.

 

“(Y/N), I want to try and make you happy.” Death said and studied her face. “I value your feelings above my own. If it is what you want, I will stay with you until the end.”

 

“Yes, that’s what I want.” She whispered, voice hoarse from crying. “And I want you to stop hating yourself.”

 

“I don’t know if I can.” He confessed.

 

“I’ll help you with it,” She said and took a deep breath, “as long as you help me with my alcoholism.” She was ashamed to finally put it in words. She had been drinking ever since the day she had arrived here, not able to handle the pain of losing Death.

 

“Of course.” He said and pulled (Y/N) closer. She let out a shaky breath as she wrapped her arms around his neck. These next few months would be hard for them both, but now that they had each other, (Y/N) was sure they could get through it.


End file.
